The confusion of complacency

It has taken me over 2 years to face the reality of the menopause and what it brings. Trying to make sense of it can be difficult. I went through most of the change blissfully unaware which means I am looking back in retrospect to get any clues as to when it may have happened and how I missed these signs. Behind the well known signs and symptoms lie a few hidden hurdles that are less well known about. On reading about these I can look back and see that some of these have been very present feautures in my life. The problem is in your late 20's you don't expect to be going through the menopause so instead your overactive brain attaches different meanings to what is happening. Unfortunately at the time I was going through the menopause I was also studying to be a doctor so I was at a very dangerous stage of knowing too much but not enough about a subject.

One of the lesser known symptoms is "tingling extremities" and I vividly remember convincing myself that I had the early onset of a neurological condition because I was getting these regular unexplained pins and needles which non of my friends seemed to be getting. It was scary at the time. You don't feel like you can talk to anyone about it because they would think you were crazy and overreacting. Then you end up telling yourself you probably are. You again enter into an unhealthy relationship with your own body where you feel it is acting against you and you aren't one in the same.

Forgetfulness is another hidden symptom. This is still something I contend with to this day, its not terrible and not debilitating forgetfulness but I do need to prompt myself sometimes or set reminders as I can predict the things I will inevitably forget! The good thing is that to tackle this you need to keep your mind and body active which at a younger age are things that are maybe easier to achieve. So although I often talk about the disadvantages of going through the change at such a young age there may be a few hidden silver linings along the way which you have to grasp when you can.

Possibly the most confusing, most embarassing and misunderstood symptom I did have was loss of bladder control. I remember for a while in my 20's having stress incontinence if I used a skipping rope during training or if I went on a trampoline. All women are aware of stress incontinence but it is usually something experienced post child birth or as you approach a later stage of life. I couldn't understand why my pelvic floor was weak at such a young age, I did my pelvic floor exercises! I was so embarrassed to talk about this with anyone and I kept it all bottled in. This miscommunication with your body and misunderstanding of what your body is actually going though is so unhealthy. It again puts a barrier between you and your body. You resent it for putting you through these things but thats because you don't understand whats happening to it.

Ultimately the danger of not having an awareness is that rather than working with your body to find solutions, you turn against her and that's not helpful to anyone. If women are more aware of some of the hidden symptoms of menopause it may help them to better understand their bodies and their journeys and to have a healthier relationship with the whole process. This is true at any age but particularly at an age when the journey starts a little too soon.